people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
you never un-have a 4some
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
