i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize