I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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