It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
