Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
He has the fingertips of a God
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize