When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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