sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Randomize
