The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
