I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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