I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
