I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
