Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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