Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
