I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
