If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
