if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
