Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
My vagina just recognized that song.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
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