Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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