there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
