My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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