Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Please, let me fuck your mom
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
