I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
