Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
