I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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