New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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