piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
