Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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