And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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