We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Randomize
