He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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