i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
