He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
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