I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
