So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
