I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
accomplished twins. life is a go
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
