drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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