this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
