their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Randomize
