Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
