i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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