I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
