so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize