My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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