The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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