I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
The air was thick with penises
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
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