so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
