Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize