Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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