i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
The uberlube is also flammable
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize