What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
how does that bad decision feel?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
