Im at strip club and am horny
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize